Reap What You Sow (R) & Reap What You Sow II (NC-17)

April 14, 2009

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Reap What You Sow (R)

When farmer Jeb Wilkins (Matthew McConaughey) is paid with seed for giving a ride to a sickly, Goth hitchhiker, he thinks nothing of it and tosses it in his garden.

Months later, pods grow where the seeds were dropped and open to unleash savage, blood-thirsty monsters. Jeb is forced to defend his farm from the invaders… by any means necessary.

Through a series of battles he (by chance) discovers their Achilles’ heel: milk. Only one drop can kill. And so begins a dangerous game of cat and mouse between farmer and monsters.

Possible scene #1: Jeb firing a shotgun at the monsters whilst riding a large squealing pig.

Possible scene #2: Barricaded in his barn, hiding behind a cow (lying on its side), Jeb is preparing to squeeze a milk-filled teat at the monsters:”Got milk, you lactose intolerant motherfu**ers?”

Sponsored by the Dairy Farmers of America

Reap What You Sow II: Fear the Banditos (R)

In an evil plot, seasonal Mexican labourers (Antonio Banderas, Benicio Del Toro and Selma Hayek) plant mysterious seeds all over Californian farms with the hope that the seed will sprout man-eating monsters that will depopulate the area, allowing them to claim the vacant land.

Plans go awry when the creatures become uncontrollable and turn on the Mexicans.

Possible scene #1: Del Toro firing a shotgun at the monsters whilst riding a large squealing pig.

Possible scene #2: Farmer running straight at the army of monsters and Mexicans, hurling a bucket of milk over them (in slow motion), shouting at the top of his voice: “GET THE HELL OUT OF CALIFORNIA!!!”

Possible scene #3: Barricaded in his barn, hiding behind Selma Hayek (lying on her side), Banderas is preparing to squeeze a milk-filled teat at the monsters:”Leche conseguida, usted fu**ers de madre intolerantes a la lactosa?”

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** perhaps the sequel can be in 3-D…

 

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